Dear Football Gods

Dear Football Gods,

It has been 30 years now and I'm still waiting for you to bestow your blessings upon my beloved Cleveland Browns. I've prayed and prayed night and day for your glory to shine down. So far, I've only been answered by bad draft picks, quarterback controversy, horrible hires and insufferable loosing streaks. I am now on my knees begging you to please have mercy upon my football soul! Why hast thou forsaken me?! Has it been me?! Was it something that I've done in the past?! That pack of twizzlers was an accident I swear! I had no idea they were in my pocket until I was in the car! Why don't you believe me!? Should a donation be made to football heaven?

Better yet... I have an idea.

I am going to sacrifice this goat in your honor...



All I ask for in return is that you bless us with one winning season... maybe a playoff push? Please!? Please Football Gods.... PLEASE!!

(For information regarding the goat sacrifice please leave a comment with your email address so that I can laugh. If you would like to attend the sacrifice or the dinner afterwards please RSVP to imtotallykiddingpeta@yahoo.com)

OOOOPS

Cleveland Browns Now Hiring

Cleveland Plain Dealer September, 28th 2009


Now Hiring for Quarterback, Offensive Line and Defensive Positions

Job Summary (Quarterback)

Ideal candidate will posses the ability to manage the offense in a manner to where the ball advances at least ten yards in less than four downs on a consistent basis. Must posses the ability to acknowledge differences in colors i.e. color blind applicants will not be considered. Must have the ability to throw the football accurately and more than 20 yards. Must understand the game of football (e.g. rules, guidelines, scoring, OVERTIME). College degree preferred. Desire to score a plus. All applicants are to forward resumes to Eric Mangini, Cleveland Browns Stadium, Cleveland, OH 44114. Oh, and please be able to read!

This Thursday!

Monster Entertainment's Fall Music Series continues this Thursday with Leaving Cash and The Quelle Source at the Kennett Flash in Historic Kennett Square, PA. Doors open @ 7pm! Tickets available now at www.KennettFlash.org. Sponsored by Graffiti Radio (www.GraffitiRadio.com).

LIVE promo radio interview tonight with Leaving Cash @ 9pm www.GraffitiRadio.com Tune In!






..........................Leaving Cash.............................................................The Quelle Source...................................

Glory!

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Let The Games Begin!

Today marks the beginning of the greatest time of year!! All the slates are clean! All the stats set to zero, and there is hope in every locker room! On any given Sunday, anything can happen and the words, "This Could Be The Year," are being echoed in every city! It's Football Time Baby!!!